The Feast

I ate garbage last week.

My foray into garbage eating started with curiosity. Doesn’t everything? I had heard about the tantalizing tidbits being served and I just wanted a nibble. Just enough to know what the commotion was about, and to join in the conversation. But a nibble was not enough, because it was just as juicy as I had been told. So the nibble turned into a full fledged bite.

One bite led to another and what I learned was that each one had a bit different seasoning that depended on who was serving it. Some bites started out mild, but the more I chewed the tangier and acrid the taste. Most, however, were served with some sort of “bang-bang sauce.” These flavors were bold and in your face. Spicy, with heat and nuance. Tangy with a surprising burst of brightness, yet an underlying hint of bitterness. Bitterness seemed to be a component of many of the recipes. I found the garbage to be truly sugar free, and any slight hints of sweetness were saccharine at best. I must say that all of it left a pungent aftertaste.

The rubbish that I was ingesting was not banana peels and coffee grounds, or anything else that could go into the stomach. This garbage was much worse. Rotten through and through, with a stench that permeated the air and those partaking. Gossip.

I found communities of people online who consider themselves righteous and good serving up other human beings with glee. Truth, half-truths, outright lies, slander were all on the menu with no distinction. Roasting reputations and fricasseed lives served with a cackle of glee and a side of malice. Who knows how many were like me, lurking and feasting on their fodder. They didn’t stop slicing and dicing with the one whose sins are being shouted from the rooftops because her sins have found her out. Nope. They started “calling out” others, trying to bring ruination to people who have been faithful to serve their community through the years. Not perfect people, but not deserving of being flambéed either. Vigilante barbecue at its worst. Everyone gets burned.

The Holy Spirit skewered me, and like the prodigal son, I “came to myself,” realizing that I had gone from sampling at the big box store to eating at a trough, feasting on what should never be eaten. I was fat and bloated, with slime and grease dripping off my face. I needed my stomach pumped. How had I gotten into the pig sty when I only wanted to nibble canapés at the party? It wasn’t hard. But also like the prodigal, I knew that I have a Father who can make things right, clean me up and restore me. I ran to Him. And He was faithful to forgive me.

I don’t know how my former colleague got where she is now, because what she is accused of is unthinkable. But I know these things:

1) It started with a curiosity and a nibble. No one intends to eat from the trough.

2) Forgiveness is available through the blood of Jesus Christ. (1 John 1:9) Forgiveness does not negate the judicial consequences of sin, only the eternal.

3) Jesus said, “Let any of you who is without sin cast the first stone at her.”(John 8:7) If this past week has confirmed nothing else, it is that I am a sinner. There, (into sin, one nibble at a time) but by the grace of God go I.

Today I start my cleansing diet and I am going to feast on the Word.

Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.